ADRIFT - ART, ALCOHOL AND ANGST

Adrift

          Sometimes I get caught up in the meanings of some of my more whimsical paintings, that is, I try to make some sort of sense out of them as I fill the canvases with colours and shapes. Many of the paintings have starry nights and huge moons glowing in the heavens, but this moon is just a sliver, a mere scythe of a moon that is about to shed a tear on someone's face, perhaps a departing soul. To me, it's a melancholy painting filled with peace and tranquility, the stark blackness signifying perhaps death and the gentle purples and pinks reluctantly letting go of fading life. Is it a death's head floating on the clouds, a lonely soul mourned by no one except an equally lonely moon or could it be a person's insight into the Universe, Earth's shadow shutting the door to the heavens? However, whether the paintings have any true meaning or not doesn't really matter because sometimes I'm just blown away by the vibrant colours, shapes and composition. The odd thing I find a little disturbing about my artistic endeavours is that once they are completed, I really don't have much use for them any more and don't really care what happens to them. I've had artistic friends that live and breathe art, it's the most important thing in their lives. However, I'm not sure how important it is to me, I only know you can't set a blank sheet of paper and something to draw or write with in front of me because I'm just like a kid with a crayon, I'm going to fill that piece of paper with some sort of illustrations or words, most likely of a poetic nature. 

          I've always had fun creating some form of art and much of what I produced was under the influence of a certain amount of alcohol or sometimes pot or some other mind altering drug. Often as not, I would count the empty beer bottles strewn about when I finished a painting and would then say it was a 3 beer or 10 beer painting. I remember painting a mural on the side of a building one hot summer. It was around the corner from a liquor store, so every morning when the store opened, I would buy a case of beer, a bag of ice and then throw it all into a waterproof box, now that's what I'm talkin' about, for me it doesn't get much better than than, although I did have to be a little careful strutting about the scaffolding. Unfortunately, because of some physical issues at the moment, I haven't had a drink for over 6 months or so and having my easel surrounded by empty near-beer bottles just doesn't seem the same ...peace, eh - Trip

  My wife and I recently started up an Etsy Store a little while ago and if you'd like to check out our artistic creations just click on the link.

A FIGMENT OF MY IMAGINATION

Reference for Commissioned Painting

             Since I've been having some medical issues recently, my energy level has dropped so low, I hardly have to lift my right foot to drop kick it where the sun never shines. Fortunately for me, during this time of not being my normal bouncy self, at least as bouncy as an old man can be, before I start pulling muscles and breaking bones, I have artistic, imaginative and creative talents to entertain me, keep my mind occupied so to speak. This not only allows me to have fun with a brush and paints but also lets me expound my thoughts by use of a keyboard and a computer. The end result could mean a finished painting that's ready to hang on a wall or a short tale that's either true or a figment of my imagination. I started writing a blog about two weeks ago and so far I've had a lot of fun with it, many of the readers seeming to enjoy the articles as well - lots of good feedback. I seldom use anyone's real name and if someone should recognize themselves within the words of an artistic mind set loose like a herd of stampeding horses, please don't be offended for it is not my intention.

Sketch for Michelle's Painting

         As soon as I'm finished writing this blog, I'll start working on laying the laminate floor upstairs, which I've been renovating for quite some time. I don't feel too bad while I'm down on my hands and knees snapping the boards together, that is, until it's time to stand up. Fortunately, not being so heavy I need a crane to lift me, leaning on a hammer and pushing up is usually sufficient to get me into a standing position and of course cursing helps - the louder I swear, the more obscure the pain. Later on, I'll take my battered knees, achy back and stiff joints downstairs, set myself down in an easy chair and dig out a blank canvas. I need to get started on a painting that a woman commissioned so it will hopefully be completed before I have an operation in two to three weeks time. So thank you Michelle, for sending me a photo of a vase full of beautiful flowers and allowing me some artistic freedom with the painting - it should be a fun project and I"ll post photos as the brush strokes, like an orchestra builds towards its climactic crescendo, a symphonic explosion of colours - if only I could brush in the exquisite aroma of roses or the soft sound of a petal as it lands on the small bench, but alas, that is not within my means. Finally managed to roughly sketch the flowers and I can see this is going to be tough to paint, I'll be doing a lot of "Double, double toil and trouble;" perhaps even some inventive cursing . But hey, I like a challenge, helps keep me trippin'...peace, eh - Trip

  My wife and I recently started up an Etsy Store a little while ago and if you'd like to check out our artistic creations just click on the link.            

WHO KNEW ENEMAS COULD BE SUCH FUN...NOT ME!

          

Napping in My Blue Bonnet

        I Went to the hospital yesterday to see if the cancer tumor, which is located in the back passage (rear end, rectum, ass hole) had receded or not after undergoing radiation and chemo treatments. Before I mention the outcome let me tell you how my day went. To begin with, when I awoke, I had thoughts of the upcoming procedure bustling about inside my head, which meant sticking a scope up my rear end; the doc has to get up close and personal to check out the tumor, put his eyeball up to a hairy key hole so to speak. Well...my arse hole was very, very tender at that moment and just thinking about it, made me cringe. However, pain or no pain, it's something that had to be done so off we went, a 1.5 hour drive to the hospital. After I signed in, I was greeted by a smiling nurse who immediately showed me where my locker was located before ushering me into a little changing room. As soon as I stripped off all my clothes except my socks, I put on a "johnny" outfit, which consists of two blue night gowns. Getting into the first one can be a bit challenging since it goes on backwards and the other one is worn like a kimono. I was hardly a fashion statement until I graced my feet with blue plastic slippers and tucked my long shaggy white hair into a blue paper bonnet. Looking in the mirror took me back to when I modeled tuxedos on a runway while escorting pretty girls on my arm who were wearing gorgeous glittery graduation gowns. After I crammed all my clothes including my shoes into a big plastic bag and then crammed it into the locker I wandered out to where the other patients were lying in beds awaiting their turn at the OR. I'd no sooner arrived, when a nurse, pony tail jauntily dangling down past her shoulders, who must have taken her daily dose of happy pills, happily introduced me to a couple of other smiling nurses before showing me to a bed. My wife Sarah was waiting for me in a bedside chair. She wasn't taking any chances with the nurses coming onto me. I mean a 76 year old guy sporting a cascade of wrinkles in need of a good ironing, and being dressed in a glamorous "Johnny" outfit can be a real come on - well...maybe to a 90 year old blind woman suffering from a double dose of degenerating dementia (chuckle, chuckle). 

        I'd no sooner climbed into bed, pulled the flannelette sheet up to my shoulders when two nurses barged through the curtain, which encircled the bed. They had an ECG machine in tow and before I knew it, one of them stuck electrodes all over my chest, while the other one wrapped my right arm in order to take my blood pressure. Everyone seemed so happy, it was as if I had arrived at my own surprise party until I heard, "Now Mr. Sherman, now that we've got you all plugged in, it's time to play Pin the Tail on the Donkey. Would you mind lying on your left side and sliding your legs up. Ah, yes, that's it. Perfect!"

          Up till then, they had me, I was cheery, boy was I cheery. I was smiling away, as happy as a laughing lark, that is until I felt a cold frigid hand on my warm right biscuit and then a plastic nozzle slowly sliding up into my narrow and I suspect swollen back passage. I could feel heat building inside me as she repeatedly but slowly squeezed a small plastic bottle containing a clear solution. When the nurse had finished giving me an enema she said, "Try to hold it in for 20 minutes." Very funny - within 4 minutes, I had the edge of my hand squeezed tightly between the clenched cheeks of my ass trying to keep from shitting myself. It didn't work and my ass was dripping as I quickly leaped out of bed and made a dash to the men's washroom. Then, like a volcano, no longer able to contain the heat within me, it burst forth and I erupted a load of hot turds hissing into the toilet bowl. It hurt like a son of a bitch, my ass felt like it was on fire when the smiley nurse with the pony tail entered the bathroom, looked at my meager deposit and said, "We'll have to give you another enema." 

          Upon hearing the nurse's words, I felt my ass drop and bounce off my heels. However, since she looked so ecstatically happy, her pony tail bouncing up and down with delight, how could I deny her the simple pleasure of squeezing something up my ass? When she checked out the results in the toilet bowl, she almost seemed to beam with joy - perhaps she enjoyed scaring me shitless. 

          Not long after the enema ordeal, my bed was wheeled into the OR, where the anesthetist, a skinny, emaciated elderly lady awaited. I remember lying on my left side and looking up at a clock on the wall, the seconds ticking off in big red numbers and then nothing - lights out! When I woke up, I was in another room and had no idea how long I had been out. Although I was slightly dazed, I couldn't feel any more pain after the scope ordeal. I was a little disappointed to learn that the doctor wasn't going to tell us anything personally, seems he was still up to his arm pits in someone else's A-hole. However, he had left a pen and ink sketch illustrating my dilemma and mentioned that it was a "small residual tumor with significant regression", so we were happy with the results. We have an appointment to see the doctor in a week, so I'm really hoping, keeping my fingers crossed that he will tell us there's a good chance of reversing the operation, he'll get my ass end up and working again...peace, eh - Trip

 My wife and I recently started up an Etsy Store a little while ago and if you'd like to check out our artistic creations just click on the link.        

FINISHED PAINTING THE SEASCAPE

Finished Painting

          Finished the painting yesterday. It took a little longer than anticipated and I'm glad to put that one behind me since I've been commissioned to paint a vase full of flowers. I'll post pictures of the flowers as the painting progresses, might give an up and coming painter an idea how to paint them. I've painted flowers before and why not, they're absolutely gorgeous. Besides, although spring is supposed to have arrived, we still have lots of snow, so painting the flowers will give my tiny studio a touch of spring. 

          Spring is definitely a special time of the year. It's amazing, although winter is very beautiful, it's definitely a very stark portion of the year - many things looking dismal and dead. That is, until spring pops her lovely head above the golden horizon and spreads her arms out over the countryside, all the foliage and flowers suddenly burst forth and come alive. One doesn't realize how tiring winter can be, the frozen cold weighing heavy on our shoulders, until cheery spring comes hippity-hoppity back into our lives. 

          I extended the height of the chicken run last spring but I see the constant heavy snows sliding off the roof of the barn has knocked much of the fence down. I would like to fix it as soon as the snow melts but that's not too likely. However, since this year will mostly be one of recovery, and I had to give our chickens away this winter, there certainly isn't an urgent rush to repair the fence. I glanced inside the chicken coop the other day, just checking to make sure some varmint hadn't moved in and I felt a little sad. The chickens were all so friendly and laying eggs really well. Oh well...if everything works out, perhaps I'll get some more chickens down the road.

          I believe I mentioned in the last blog what this painting represents to me but I'm curious as to what people see and what they think about this painting. Anyone have any good ideas for a title. If so, please leave a comment below. Well...I have a lot to do today so I best get started...peace, eh - Trip

My wife and I started up an Etsy Store a little while ago and if you'd like to check out our artistic creations just click on the link.       

LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE IT

Pic 4 - Unfinished Seascape

          Life is what you make it. There's a lot of truth in those words. Whether it's for the good or not so good often depends upon the decisions we make when confronted by obstacles that we have no idea how to handle. At age 76, I'm still of a firm belief that much of what happens to us as we proceed through life is mostly made possible by our own hands; no matter how chaotic life may seem, we usually remain in control of our own lives. Sure, there are surprises we can't anticipate that occur outside our little realms that often toss our little juggling balls around and the ones we catch while they're all up in the air may not be the best choices. But even if they are the wrong choices, one can sometimes remedy the negativity, which they may incur, in other words pull ourselves up by the bootstraps and make the best of it. I can't speak for others but I doubt that I'm alone when it comes to making bad choices. Like anyone, I have a lot of regrets regarding some of the choices I've made, choices which undoubtedly affected the remainder of my days. However, as I bumped my way through life up to this point, I've learned to sidestep, camouflage or mold those bad decisions into an acceptance I'm able to cope with, which occasionally even means lying to myself - whatever gets me through the day so to speak. At the moment, I've reached another crossroad in life. It's a major one for me because seldom ever being sick during my whole life, don't even get hangovers, my body has suddenly been invaded by cancer. Hardly ever taken a pill of any kind in my whole life, I'm not sure how my body will stand up to the chemo and radiation and all the other possible remedies, including the operation. I've had to and still have tough decisions to make regarding my health and for the first time, even my possible death. 

          When the doctor hands me some pamphlets regarding last wishes if everything happens to go sideways, I don't die but no longer have my faculties, my wits about me, would I like to have my life prolonged? This is a pretty big "life is what you make it" decision but I feel it would be a little unfair of me to lay this burden on the shoulders of the people I love, for them to have to make that decision, especially one, which they might feel guilty about the rest of their days. So, I don't kid myself, I'm an old guy, all kinds of things could go wrong once I'm out cold lying on my back in the operating room; the surgeon standing over me holding a sharp blade in his hand. Anyway, if worse comes to worse, I wrote and signed a little document informing everyone of my wishes. I don't know why, but it reminds me of a time years ago when a life insurance salesman came knocking at the door. When he told me about all the benefits and how my wife and family would be looked after, an "investment in the future", being a businessman at that time I responded, "I'm not interested. I don't see how investing in my future demise is beneficial." Maybe I should get in touch with a life insurance company now, I wonder what my rate would be, probably so high I'd wish I was dead once it came time to start making payments.

Tow Hill - Haida Gwaii, BC

          Not too sure how my future is looking but as I continue painting the seascape, I'm reminded of a time I rode my motorcycle and took a ferry to Haida Gwaii about 30 years ago. I camped near the base of Tow Hill that pokes up out of a rocky beach, the Northern Pacific caressing and at stormy times slapping its bottom. The Hiellen River flows into the sea at this location and just before dark, the hint of stars in the heavens, I could see a tree, its silhouette greeting the incoming tide. Although the steep cliffs in the painting don't resemble Tow Hill nor does the tree look anything like the one I saw everyday for the week I was there, the painting still puts me in touch with that time alone, just me, Tow Hill and the tree. I climbed Tow Hill in the pouring rain (rains a lot in Haida Gwaii) and the view from the top is spectacular. The sandy, wind swept beach stretches out to a place called Rose Spit, which I hiked to on a warm sunny day. It was tough slogging through the deep sand and by the time I arrived back at camp I had blisters on both feet. That night, after sterilizing a large salmon fishing hook in the campfire, I popped them all, the relief almost instantaneous. I don't know what it is about Haida Gwaii, whether it's mystical or spiritual, but there is a captivating sense about those islands and when the time came for me to pack up my stuff and bike off, before leaving I strolled out to the tree, took one last lingering look around and then gave it a big hug...peace, eh - Trip

My wife and I started up an Etsy Store a little while ago and if you'd like to check out our artistic creations just click on the link.

SUNNY MORNING - GREEN MOUNTAIN HIGH

Pic 3 - 12" x 16" acrylic seascape in progress

          Looks like another sunny day as I glance out the window across the snow-filled pasture and up towards the forested ridge. During the winter, after each snowfall I would often see deer and moose tracks crisscrossing one another but this winter there seems to be a lack of prints. I heard on the radio the other day that St. Andrews, NB is considering a deer-culling in response to too many Bambi's taking up residence in people's yards. They say the deer population in the area has increased and that may be but still, people's yards are not the natural habitat for deer. I suspect that if the forests keep getting carelessly denuded and poisoned that even more wildlife, not just deer will be moving into the towns and cities. It's only natural for them to migrate to where food is available. And isn't it odd how we put the blame on the deer and not recognizing the fact that us humans are the real problem.

          Since I haven't been my normal bouncy self the last while, I have been painting more, not just to wile away the time but to still be productive in my own way. I've been enjoying working in my small kitchen-studio alongside my wife Sarah as she bakes, cooks, draws mandalas and braids small rugs. We can talk or not, whatever the mood suits or how concentrated we are on our projects, which are leaning more towards the hippie era, flowers, beads, peace and love. We listen to a lot of 60's and 70's music, Sarah often singing along to a Janis Joplin hit like Me and Bobby McGee. It's a fun time together. 

          Living out in the boonies makes it a touch difficult to earn a living so we have been putting some effort into getting our online Etsy store up and running. Since there are so many other similar stores, it's a touch difficult to bring one's own store to the forefront. But like a fellow-Etsy person said, "It took me about a year before I started doing real well," so we'll just keep plugging away at promoting it. My only problem with selling artwork in this manner, it sometimes makes me feel like a used car salesman. And then, I guess it's like my publisher told me years ago, "You have to sell your book shamelessly." So that's what I'm doing as I pull my overcoat open and say, "Would you like to buy a painting? No. How about a boho bag, a fridge magnet or a bookmark? How about a book? Would you like to buy a book so you can use your new bookmark?" These things and more are available at our Etsy store.

          Well...time to get on with my day and start work on my painting and since it's looking very pleasant, a Green Mountain-high, a short walk just might be the ticket too. Perhaps I'll see some deer tracks but I doubt it. Since our neighbours cut down their trees, I've noticed a lack of wildlife in the area. It wasn't uncommon to see a bear tromp across the yard, a fox dart out of the forest, a wild turkey stop under the apple tree or a moose thunder off towards the ridge but over the last year, very few wild animals have I seen...peace, eh - Trip

PAINTING CAN BE A PAIN RELIEVER

Any thoughts for a title?

          Not one of my better days as far as pain goes so I picked up my brushes and started dabbing a little paint around to take my mind off it. Have no idea if this painting will work out but what the hey, so far it seems to be coming along. Painting water for me has always been a challenge, so painting the waves crashing on this distant shore is sure to keep me intrigued. 

          During my life, I've certainly taken a lot for granted. I just sort of figured that the world wouldn't be that much different when I started out at birth hanging by my heels in the Prince George General Hospital, a doctor slapping my little round ass to welcome me into the world. But sadly, I was duped and sold a bill of goods much like each generation after me. Anyone who can't see what's happening to our world in my opinion is either ignorant or just stupid and the problem with that, there isn't any way of talking any sense to those sort of people. A person's education shouldn't end on graduation day, it should be an on going thing until we die. But as it's happens, most of us think we are pretty smart and nothing could be further from the truth, which is why most of us have been taken advantage of and led down the garden path. The people in power could do so much good in this world if they really wanted to but there is more money to be made in destruction - nothing like a bloody good war to level cities and then afterwards go in and rebuild them. 

          Anyway, I'm painting pretty pictures to remind me of a world that was once natural and beautiful, not like now, the oceans plugged with plastic garbage, oil spills poisoning the land, and the forests being mowed down like a lawn. The air too in some places is getting to the point where it's polluted so bad, it's not healthy to go outdoors. The seas are rising at an alarming rate and the kids are killing kids on a wholesale level. A person doesn't have to have the brains of a rocket scientist to know there is something dreadfully wrong and it also doesn't take a brainiac to see that a moron like Trump and his ilk are speeding up the destruction of our planet. And in our own country, sucking up to the people in the oil industry, whether they're the corporation owners or the people who work for them is just wrong, their dinosaur thinking will have us all join those great behemoths of long ago - extinct! Whew...got a little hot under the collar there...I get a little angry and ashamed to, when I start thinking about the world I'll be leaving to my kids and there kids...peace, eh - Trip

          Also, if anyone is interested in seeing or perhaps purchasing any of my other artwork, just click on this Etsy link.  Also, if you're enjoying my blogs and don't want to miss any, please become a follower by simply clicking the FOLLOW button near the top right hand side of the page.