TO FLATUATE OR INFATUATE - THAT IS THE QUESTION?

            

          I awoke this morning to semi-darkness, actually slept in until 7am. When I went outside with McGee for his wake-up poopoo-peepee walk, snow was and had been falling for quite sometime - about 3" deeper than yesterday. While McGee buried his nose in the snow, looking for the exact spot to deposit his little golden nuggets, a quietness and stillness abounded everywhere except for the excitement building in my heart; I could hear it as clearly as waves crashing on a shore. And why, you may ask? A part of me that's been missing for almost three weeks, my Sarah (Daisy) will be home this afternoon. Although the puppy has been great company while she was away, our conversations have been lacking due to me not understanding hardly an arf or a woof of shih tzu. 

          Since more snow is expected, I shoveled the walkway and cleared most of it off two roofs. Although I worked up a sweat and now have a few aches and pains, anyone who has gone through what I have the last couple of years will understand how good it feels to be able to do such a thing. I can't be certain but I think my swollen pot gut has gone down a little or maybe it was the gigantic fart I let rip (damn near tore a hole in my pants) just before I stepped inside the house. And speaking of escaping gas, it reminds me of a Kurt Vonnegut poem I read and for some reason has never left me, which goes something like this: 

          

          Cindy in the garden

          Sifting cinders

          Lifted up her leg

          And farted like a man

          

          The bursting of her bloomers

          Broke sixteen winders

          And the cheeks of her ass

          Went clap, clap, clap!

          

          Now that's a visual I've never been able to forget, which always puts a smile on my face.  Kurt Vonnegut was one of my favourite authors and one of his books, Slaughterhouse 5, was made into a movie - great stuff by a brilliant mind - a satirist extraordinaire. 

          Well...I better post this blog finished now as I still have some household chores to do before my wife arrives - like damp-mop the upstairs, wash a few dishes and just a general tidy-up. Also, that wee McGee will be waking up soon and demanding to go outside - just like me after a nap - it's time to do the crap and piddle (good name for a pub - hahaha)...cheers, eh!